Bob Bob just payed $1,000,000 to have Mateo assassinated!

Reason For Assassination: Annoying
‘Hit’ Method: Thrown off a cliff

Last Words They Heard: “Told you to back off those donuts.”

Bob Bob’s Personality Type: “Don’t have one…”
Mateo’s Personality Type: “I love the smell of napalm in the morning.”

Bob Bob’s Site (if available) – http://something.com
Mateo’s Site (if available) – http://something.com

It is Optimism Through Pessimism Records, so… let’s put a positive spin on it, shall we?

Reward Them For: Breakin’ On Through

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Sir Gregory just payed $1 to have Daphne Rosen assassinated!

Reason For Assassination: Workaholic
‘Hit’ Method: Drowned

Last Words They Heard: “You’ve got to ask yourself a question: Do I feel lucky? Well, do ya, punk?”

Sir Gregory’s Personality Type: “Bond, James Bond.”
Daphne Rosen’s Personality Type: “Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes! Oh God, oh… ‘I’ll have what she’s having.’”

Sir Gregory’s Site (if available) –
Daphne Rosen’s Site (if available) – www.datedaphne.com

It is Optimism Through Pessimism Records, so… let’s put a positive spin on it, shall we?

Reward Them For: Being A Great Friend!

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Declan Owens just payed $0.05 to have Sean Curran assassinated!

Reason For Assassination: Attends church too often
‘Hit’ Method: Beat Down

Last Words They Heard: “Hah!”

Declan Owens’s Personality Type: “Never give up! Never surrender!”
Sean Curran ’s Personality Type: “Would you be shocked if I put on something more comfortable?”

Declan Owens’s Site (if available) – http://
Sean Curran ’s Site (if available) – http://

It is Optimism Through Pessimism Records, so… let’s put a positive spin on it, shall we?

Reward Them For: Best Podcast Ever!

Hire An Assassin: http://big-hiredassassin.com/assassinate-someone
Big-Hired Assassin brought to you by http://otprecords.com

Declan Owens just payed $0.25 to have Ryan Heaney assassinated!

Reason For Assassination: Ugly feet
‘Hit’ Method: Drowned

Last Words They Heard: “Should’ve taken that vacation.”

Declan Owens ’s Personality Type: “You are not a man.”
Ryan Heaney’s Personality Type: “You talkin’ to me? You talkin’ to me? You talkin’ to me?”

Declan Owens ’s Site (if available) – http://
Ryan Heaney’s Site (if available) – http://

It is Optimism Through Pessimism Records, so… let’s put a positive spin on it, shall we?

Reward Them For: Magical Code Wizard

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Declan Owens just payed $0.05 to have Michael Clarke assassinated!

Reason For Assassination: Too friendly
‘Hit’ Method: Stabbed

Last Words They Heard: “Hasta la vista, baby!”

Declan Owens ’s Personality Type: “They’re gonna need some more FBI guys, I guess.”
Michael Clarke’s Personality Type: “All people are born alike — except Republicans and Democrats.”

Declan Owens ’s Site (if available) – http://
Michael Clarke’s Site (if available) – http://

It is Optimism Through Pessimism Records, so… let’s put a positive spin on it, shall we?

Reward Them For: Being Great With Their Hands

Hire An Assassin: http://big-hiredassassin.com/assassinate-someone
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Declan Owens just payed $1 to have Ryan O’Keeffe assassinated!

Reason For Assassination: Eats too much
‘Hit’ Method: Nuked

Last Words They Heard: “Go ahead. Make my day.”

Declan Owens ’s Personality Type: “I love the smell of napalm in the morning.”
Ryan O’Keeffe’s Personality Type: “Never give up! Never surrender!”

Declan Owens ’s Site (if available) – http://
Ryan O’Keeffe’s Site (if available) – http://

It is Optimism Through Pessimism Records, so… let’s put a positive spin on it, shall we?

Reward Them For: Best Podcast Ever!

Hire An Assassin: http://big-hiredassassin.com/assassinate-someone
Big-Hired Assassin brought to you by http://otprecords.com