Sales are through the roof!

Most of the sales are coming from digital distributors like iTunes, or pay for plays such as Rhapsody. There was one pressing of the actual cd, and there will be no more sent to print.

It will be extremely rare to have a copy of this! Get your copy now at CD Baby!

New album is in the works. Here's a taste -- Booby Trap -- Pay attention!

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Hire An AssassinHire An Assassin - Have a friend, family member, spouse, podcast, or news article that you want assassinated? Well, you've come to the right place! Tell us about it, and if the price is right (content is submitted decently) we'll take care of business.

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Random Assassinated News

Aerosmith’s Tyler in rehab to recover from foot injuries

TylerLOS ANGELES, California (AP) — Steven Tyler checked into a rehab facility in search of a “safe environment” to recover from several foot surgeries and physical therapy, the Aerosmith frontman said in a statement Thursday.

Aerosmith frontman Steven Tyler says he needed a “safe environment” to recover from his foot surgeries.

Tyler said the surgeries were to correct long-time foot injuries resulting from his physical performances as the singer for the blues-rock band.

“The doctors told me the pain in my feet could be corrected but it would require a few surgeries over time,” Tyler said in the statement. “The ‘foot repair’ pain was intense, greater than I’d anticipated. The months of rehabilitative care and the painful strain of physical therapy were traumatic. I really needed a safe environment to recuperate where I could shut off my phone and get back on my feet.”

The 60-year-old was known for heavy drug and alcohol abuse in the 1970s and early 1980s, but completed rehabilitation in 1986, after which Aerosmith enjoyed a successful revival.

Recently Assassinated Content

gareth was assassinated!

January 3rd, 2010 @ 2:04 pm

gareth just payed $500 to have gareth assassinated!

Reason For Assassination: Smells funny
‘Hit’ Method: Baseball bat

Last Words They Heard: “Hasta la vista, baby!”

gareth’s Personality Type: “Bond, James Bond.”
gareth’s Personality Type: “Elementary, my dear Watson!”

gareth’s Site (if available) – http://youwilldielol.co.uk.http
gareth’s Site (if available) – http://

It is Optimism Through Pessimism Records, so… let’s put a positive spin on it, shall we?

Reward Them For: Being A Twitter-Head

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Alistair Wood was assassinated!

January 3rd, 2010 @ 10:49 am

Jacob Guilherme just payed $1,000,000 to have Alistair Wood assassinated!

Reason For Assassination: Makes me look bad
‘Hit’ Method: Thrown off a cliff

Last Words They Heard: “I see dead people.”

Jacob Guilherme’s Personality Type: “I’m gonna make him an offer he can’t refuse.”
Alistair Wood’s Personality Type: “Alimony is like buying hay for a dead horse.”

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Alistair Wood’s Site (if available) – http://

It is Optimism Through Pessimism Records, so… let’s put a positive spin on it, shall we?

Reward Them For: Making Great Videos

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Dana Cholakova was assassinated!

December 31st, 2009 @ 8:50 am

Merlina Rodas just payed $1,000,000 to have Dana Cholakova assassinated!

Reason For Assassination: Doesn’t like me
‘Hit’ Method: Stabbed

Last Words They Heard: “Who’s laughing now?”

Merlina Rodas’s Personality Type: “Keep your friends close, but your enemies closer.”
Dana Cholakova’s Personality Type: “Magic Mirror on the Wall, who is the Fairest one of all?”

Merlina Rodas’s Site (if available) – http://
Dana Cholakova’s Site (if available) – http://

It is Optimism Through Pessimism Records, so… let’s put a positive spin on it, shall we?

Reward Them For: Hot Bod!

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Jesus Monjarez was assassinated!

December 29th, 2009 @ 10:15 pm

Jonothin Charles just payed $0.05 to have Jesus Monjarez assassinated!

Reason For Assassination: Annoying
‘Hit’ Method: Baseball bat

Last Words They Heard: “I see dead people.”

Jonothin Charles’s Personality Type: “I love the smell of napalm in the morning.”
Jesus Monjarez’s Personality Type: “Frankly my dear, I don’t give a damn.”

Jonothin Charles’s Site (if available) – http://
Jesus Monjarez’s Site (if available) – http://

It is Optimism Through Pessimism Records, so… let’s put a positive spin on it, shall we?

Reward Them For: Magical Code Wizard

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john was assassinated!

December 27th, 2009 @ 10:13 am

dan just payed $1 to have john assassinated!

Reason For Assassination: Doesn’t attend church
‘Hit’ Method: Pistol Whipped

Last Words They Heard: “You’ve got to ask yourself a question: Do I feel lucky? Well, do ya, punk?”

dan’s Personality Type: “Fuh-get about it.”
john’s Personality Type: “Whoever named it necking was a poor judge of anatomy.”

dan’s Site (if available) – http://
john’s Site (if available) – http://

It is Optimism Through Pessimism Records, so… let’s put a positive spin on it, shall we?

Reward Them For: Mad Computer Skills!

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LID was assassinated!

December 23rd, 2009 @ 6:29 am

Nick just payed $0.05 to have LID assassinated!

Reason For Assassination: Ugly feet
‘Hit’ Method: Chinese Water Torture

Last Words They Heard: “Go ahead. Make my day.”

Nick’s Personality Type: “I love the smell of napalm in the morning.”
LID’s Personality Type: “Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes! Oh God, oh… ‘I’ll have what she’s having.’”

Nick’s Site (if available) – http://
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It is Optimism Through Pessimism Records, so… let’s put a positive spin on it, shall we?

Reward Them For: Hot Bod!

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