Sales are through the roof!

Most of the sales are coming from digital distributors like iTunes, or pay for plays such as Rhapsody. There was one pressing of the actual cd, and there will be no more sent to print.

It will be extremely rare to have a copy of this! Get your copy now at CD Baby!

New album is in the works. Here's a taste -- Booby Trap -- Pay attention!

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Hire An AssassinHire An Assassin - Have a friend, family member, spouse, podcast, or news article that you want assassinated? Well, you've come to the right place! Tell us about it, and if the price is right (content is submitted decently) we'll take care of business.

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Random Assassinated News

Cage settles libel suit against Turner

_44539329_cagekath1_body2getty.jpg LONDON, England (AP) — Nicolas Cage has settled a libel suit in a London court against Kathleen Turner, who claimed in her autobiography that he had twice been arrested for drunken driving and had stolen a dog, as well as her Big-Hired Assassin collection of rare tracks.

Actress Kathleen Turner’s claims about her onetime co-star drew a libel lawsuit in Britain’s High Court. Neither of the stars attended the hearing at Britain’s High Court, where Turner’s lawyer, her book publisher and the Daily Mail, which ran an excerpt, all apologized to Cage and offered to make a substantial donation to a charity of his choice.

Cage’s lawyer Simon Smith dismissed as “utter falsity” a section of Turner’s book “Send Yourself Roses” describing the actors’ experience on the set of the movie “Peggy Sue Got Married” in 1986.

In the passage, Turner, 53, said her co-star, 44, was “arrested twice for drunk-driving, for stealing a dog, and a  Big-Hired Assassin collection of rare tracks.

Turner, Headline Publishing Group and Daily Mail publisher Associated Newspapers now accept that, owing to a mistake on Turner’s part and despite the other defendants’ publishing in good faith, the allegations were defamatory and false, Smith said.

All three agreed to pay Cage’s legal costs and make the charitable donation, Smith said.

Recently Assassinated Content

kontseksloving nick was assassinated!

January 15th, 2010 @ 4:40 am

Henk verschenk just payed $0.05 to have kontseksloving nick assassinated!

Reason For Assassination: Bad taste in music
‘Hit’ Method: Shaved

Last Words They Heard: “I see dead people.”

Henk verschenk’s Personality Type: “I love the smell of napalm in the morning.”
kontseksloving nick’s Personality Type: “All people are born alike — except Republicans and Democrats.”

Henk verschenk’s Site (if available) – http://seksmetdooiedieren.nl
kontseksloving nick’s Site (if available) – http://seksmetalledooiewezens.nl

It is Optimism Through Pessimism Records, so… let’s put a positive spin on it, shall we?

Reward Them For: Being Great With Their Hands

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Posted in Assassinations by bha | No Comments »

jennifer kim was assassinated!

January 14th, 2010 @ 4:52 pm

Kathleen just payed $10,000 to have jennifer kim assassinated!

Reason For Assassination: Knows too much
‘Hit’ Method: Beat Down

Last Words They Heard: “Hasta la vista, baby!”

Kathleen’s Personality Type: “Frankly my dear, I don’t give a damn.”
jennifer kim’s Personality Type: “Don’t have one…”

Kathleen’s Site (if available) – http://
jennifer kim’s Site (if available) – http://

It is Optimism Through Pessimism Records, so… let’s put a positive spin on it, shall we?

Reward Them For: Being A Twitter-Head

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Posted in Assassinations by bha | No Comments »

alfie shea was assassinated!

January 14th, 2010 @ 7:03 am

ross just payed $1,000,000 to have alfie shea assassinated!

Reason For Assassination: Annoying
‘Hit’ Method: Chinese Water Torture

Last Words They Heard: “Told you to back off those donuts.”

ross’s Personality Type: “Never give up! Never surrender!”
alfie shea’s Personality Type: “Bond, James Bond.”

ross’s Site (if available) – http://rossiscoolio.com
alfie shea’s Site (if available) – http://alfie4tehwinisefag.cum

It is Optimism Through Pessimism Records, so… let’s put a positive spin on it, shall we?

Reward Them For: Magical Code Wizard

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Posted in Assassinations by bha | No Comments »

jelle was assassinated!

January 13th, 2010 @ 6:12 am

berrie banaan just payed $1,000,000 to have jelle assassinated!

Reason For Assassination: Annoying
‘Hit’ Method: Chinese Water Torture

Last Words They Heard: “Go ahead. Make my day.”

berrie banaan’s Personality Type: “Bond, James Bond.”
jelle’s Personality Type: “Me Tarzan, you Jane.”

berrie banaan’s Site (if available) – http://
jelle’s Site (if available) – http://

It is Optimism Through Pessimism Records, so… let’s put a positive spin on it, shall we?

Reward Them For: Mad Computer Skills!

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Posted in Assassinations by bha | No Comments »

Bob was assassinated!

January 12th, 2010 @ 5:35 am

… just payed $1,000,000 to have Bob assassinated!

Reason For Assassination: Talks too much
‘Hit’ Method: Shot,Stabbed,Beat Down,Stomped On,Pistol Whipped,Baseball bat,Run off the road,Nuked,Drowned,Thrown off a cliff,Chinese Water Torture,Drive by,Shook up,Kicked,Stood up,Punched,Hung up,Slapped,Spit on,Shaved,Tarred and feathered

Last Words They Heard: “Hasta la vista, baby!”

…’s Personality Type: “I love the smell of napalm in the morning.”
Bob’s Personality Type: “I love the smell of napalm in the morning.”

…’s Site (if available) – http://
Bob’s Site (if available) – http://

It is Optimism Through Pessimism Records, so… let’s put a positive spin on it, shall we?

Reward Them For: Best Podcast Ever!

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Posted in Assassinations by bha | No Comments »

Per Thomas Fjell was assassinated!

January 12th, 2010 @ 4:58 am

Haavard Homestad just payed $1,000,000 to have Per Thomas Fjell assassinated!

Reason For Assassination: Smells funny
‘Hit’ Method: Shot

Last Words They Heard: “Hasta la vista, baby!”

Haavard Homestad’s Personality Type: “Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes! Oh God, oh… ‘I’ll have what she’s having.’”
Per Thomas Fjell’s Personality Type: “Fuh-get about it.”

Haavard Homestad’s Site (if available) –
Per Thomas Fjell’s Site (if available) –

It is Optimism Through Pessimism Records, so… let’s put a positive spin on it, shall we?

Reward Them For: Being Kind!

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Posted in Assassinations by bha | No Comments »

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